Showing posts with label early dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label early dating. Show all posts

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Dating...

Dating Dos
Be attentive to your date.
If you listen to your date, they think you're interesting even though you haven't actually said anything. Just keep asking questions and they'll think you're brilliant and fascinating.

Maintain eye contact.
Just make sure it's not too intense. Remember, you aren't a hawk eyeing it's prey.

Plan your date out ahead of time.
Avoid falling into the vicious cycle of saying, "I don't know, what do you want to do?" Decide on something and do it. Be open to other suggestions if your plans don't work out.

Meet in a public place on your first date.
Not only is this a safe idea, it also allows for distractions should conversation lag. Leave the one-on romantic dates for when you really feel you are into a person.

Offer to split the bill.

The issue of "who pays" is probably one of the largest sources of confusion for singles. Most people today feel that the bill is the responsibility of the party that asked for the date. That said, it is courteous to offer to "go Dutch" and you should always be prepared to split the costs. If your date does pick up the tab, offer to pay the next time.

Act chivalrous.
Men, the women's liberation movement may have provided women with the means to financial independence and positions of power, but this does not mean that she no longer appreciates those little things that make you a gentlemen.
Open doors for your date, pull out her chair for her, make sure she gets home safely.
These are the things that make a good impression. If used correctly, chivalry is the charm of all charms; if overused, it seems like machismo.

Follow up with your date.
Call or email your date to let them know you had a good time. This doesn't have to be a plea to see them again right away. It's simply a courtesy. If your date had an enjoyable time too, this will be icing on the cake!

Crack jokes.
Not only will this put your date at ease, it will show them you have a sense of humor.

Discuss heavier topics.
Let's face it, some people SHOULD stick to small talk, but if you're informed on a topic, go ahead and discuss it.
If you find some topics appropriate and your date finds them taboo, it may be better to realize this early on.

Dating Don'ts
Don't act distracted during a date.
Turn off your cell phone and keep your eyes from wandering.
Nothing will show a greater lack of interest on your part than fielding phone calls and checking out the waitstaff.

Don't turn your date into a therapy session.
Avoid subjects like your ex, your bad relationship with your mother or your growing sense of insecurity over the strange growth you've discovered on your back.

Don't be pretentious.
Be real.
Nobody is perfect and nothing is more annoying than someone who acts like they are.

Don't agree for the sake of agreeing.
It's important to stand your ground and let your date know where you stand on certain topics. The point is getting to know one another. Most people enjoy intellectual argument, as long as you avoid insulting your date's intelligence.

Don't try to make any uninvited physical advances.
There are so many different opinions on what is acceptable, physically, on a date.
if there is chemistry, the physical aspects of a relationship will fall into place. If things feel right, then hold hands, kiss, whatever feels right. Nothing is worse, though, than a first date who is way too into PDA (public displays of affection). It's sort of like they are staking their claim, which is a major turn-off.

Women, don't be afraid to ask a man for a date.
In fact, many men find a woman who will make the first move attractive and confident.
You can invite the guy to something you are going to anyway, like a concert, so it's like you are asking them to come along.

Don't consume large amounts of alcohol.
You should not drink and date. and you know why.

Don't be afraid to end the date early.
If things aren't working out or you are uncomfortable, feel free to end the date at any time.

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there's always unspoken rules on everything. at times, we are just expected to watch and learn from mistakes.



Thursday, July 31, 2008

Early Steady Dating



in Expository Writing class this morning, we debated on two topics.

topic 1: Early Steady Dating
and
topic 2: To Marry or not to Marry

I choose to join the team on debating "early steady dating" and my group was on the proposing side.
as for another topic, to debate on the topic "to marry or not to marry" is kind of hard because our social norms is very against cohabiting couples. so no matter how good your stance in supporting cohabiting, most of the people will also have more traditional ideas to fight your stance off. cohabiting is still new for the eastern society, therefore it is not easy for the cohabiting couples to live a peaceful life. there will be a lot of rumours out and about which is damaging to their relationships. thus, there was just one person in class volunteered to oppose marriage for couples and therefore the other two opposing speaker have to "act" like they oppose to the idea of couples getting married.

so.. back to Early Steady Dating.

here's our points on early steady dating.



1) Early Steady Dating should not be discouraged because we can not generalise that teenagers are incapable of managing their relationship rationally. Do you not think that adults will also lose their rationality when it comes to romantic issues? Yes, they will get hurt as they face issues in their romantic relationships. however, it is still better to learn to accept the risk of getting hurt early than to suffer when you have become a successful person in your career. Adults get hurt as well, right?

2) Starting early will not only help teenagers gain
dating experiences, it can also in a way protect them from getting hurt in later life. It is better to start early than to start late. There are many cases where adults who start dating in their twenties made incorrect judgment in finding their ideal life partner, which end up in unsuccessful marriage. This is because they are too inexperience in evaluating whether the partner is really suitable before they get married. Some, get married because they think they are well passing the golden age of getting married. Therefore, they regretted later in life as they made too quick a decision to start a family when they thought they have met "the one".

3) Through early steady dating, you will be able to get to know many more faces and personalities there are in the society. if you start dating only after you graduate and have a stable job... How would you know, at 25... as you date your first boyfriend or girlfriend, he or she is really the one?? he or she is the first partner you ever dated. so if you start early, after a few possibly unsuccessful relationships, you will be able to recognise instantly when the one guy or woman who really compatible for you arrives! you will be ready by then. ^^

4) Maturity. Teenangers are said to be immature. yes, we do not deny this fact. BUT, it is only through gaining experience that people will grow more mature in life stages. In every aspects in life, including romantic aspects, we need experiences to learn. and through accumulating experiences, we become mature through time. the same applies in dating. as you date, you will come across different personalities and there will come a day where, at one stage, you come to understand what kind of personalities really suits you. and what qualities that you are looking for in life partner.

5) People says teenangers have no idea what love is. Then, let us ask again do you think every adults knows what love is? do you? therefore, we stress the point again that early steady dating helps. why? because starting to date early, as you experience, you will someday understand what is love to you. Every individual has his or her own perception and understanding of love. it is until that day when you finally realise what love means to you that you will not make mistake in finding your life partner. if you start dating in later stage in life, you will start as a newbie and will easily get false idea of what love is and make the deadly mistake of marrying the wrong person.

Therefore, my house strongly propose early steady dating. thank you.